Wait, whaaat? Serving up some tasty humans??
Yes, Tasty Humans. As in the board game?
Dinner is served
Surely you didn't think I was writing about Dr. Lecter's unusual culinary preferences, did you? While that may make for a rather interesting topic, I'll save that for another time. If you read my last blog, and I really hope you did, you might see a pattern of food-related games that I've written about. And you'd be right. Besides Food Truck Champion, I wrote about Lord of the Fries a few years ago and plan on writing about a few other food-centric games we have.
Tasty Humans was released in January of this year, and we've managed several plays so far. In fact, it's part of our 10 X 10 challenge. Given the craziness of 2020, with most people in some form of "lockdown," it should be relatively easy to complete a 10 X 10 challenge. We are only 16 plays short of finishing ours, and the year is barely half over. Designed by Ryan Langewisch, and published by Pangea Games, this was a Kickstarter project that I backed, and I'm glad I did. The fascinating part about backing a Kickstarter project is being able to get a behind the scenes look at how a game is developed. The Tasty Humans team was very active in social media, and with their backers. We got to vote on several monster designs that made it into the final product. You'll meet these creatures shortly. Another advantage of many Kickstarter projects is getting exclusive upgrades and components that generally aren't available in the retail version.
For my new readers, clicking on any photo will display a larger format version of it in a new window. Clicking on any blue link will also open in a new window, so you won't lose your place here.
What is Tasty Humans all about? It's a 1 - 4 player game pitting legendary monsters against hapless villagers who seem to be quite tasty. It has card drafting, tile-laying, and pattern-building as its main mechanics. Players take the role of a legendary monster and select a yummy villager from an ever-changing tableau as its next meal. Each monster has a special hunger or "personal craving" that must be satisfied by selecting the right villager. Played over a series of rounds, each player will take two turns per round, selecting the most appealing villager to consume. The game ends when the first monster's belly gets full.
I promise you the game isn't as gross as the way I described it. There's no visible blood or gore, although any sound effects or role-playing you may choose to do might add to the mental image (and fun) of it. It's entirely suitable for kids 10 years or older. Playing time is listed as 30 - 60 minutes, and our average has been on the upper end of that range. Most of our games tend to run on the longer side of the scale since "she who must not be named" has the dreaded analysis paralysis when playing. So, are you ready to meet the cast of monsters that will be munching on those poor villagers? Right this way.
Hannibal Lecter
Sorry, I couldn't resist. Dr. Lecter is not part of this game, even though I lobbied the designers to include him as one of the stretch goals in Kickstarter. I'm sure the licensing fees would've been prohibitive. I'll introduce the real monsters of Tasty Humans in the order they appear in the rule book. The first four were part of the original design, and the next four are all stretch goals that were unlocked during the Kickstarter campaign. Monsters are randomly selected, so in the words of Forrest Gump, you never know what you're gonna get. The game designers recommend playing one of the first four monsters if this is the first time (or two) playing the game. And I would agree with them.
By the way, in my personal opinion, the graphic design and artwork in this game are simply brilliant. I think it is one of the best aspects of Tasty Humans outside of the actual gameplay. I wish I had even a small fraction of the talent to produce something like this. Following are the actual monsters and a closeup of their "personal cravings." The grid on the right of each playmat represents the monster's stomach. Each square will need to be filled with a body part (or other types of tiles) to one of the top three rows, depending upon the number of players.
Legendary Dragon
"LD's" Personal craving
When I first saw this dragon, it immediately reminded me of the title character from Pete's Dragon. No small wonder, I guess, as I figure all dragons share an essential shape. That's what makes them a dragon, and not a manticore. Of the few times we've played, I like this one!
Twin-Headed Dragon
Twin-head's Personal Craving
What could be more fierce than a dragon? How about a twin-headed dragon. Double the heads, and double the appetite, I guess. This is my second favorite monster to play. These first two are the easiest to score the "personal craving" requirements as you'll see later.
The Troll
Troll's Personal Craving
Now this is just sad. I saw the troll's club and my first thought was "That looks like a large, brown Cheeto." Well, if we are talking about internet trolls (we're not), I guess Cheetos would be appropriate. But brown Cheetos? Maybe it's a limited release flavor, like swamp rat or marsh weasel?
The Griffin
Griffin's Personal Craving
My first reaction when I saw Griffin's face was he/she looked really ticked off. Kinda reminded me of the way Wile E. Coyote looked whenever one of his elaborately laid plans backfired. Where does Griffin live? Being a lion-eagle hybrid, does it live in a tree or in a ground-based shelter? At night, how would the Griffin secure its dwelling? With a......wait for it......griffin door!
Yeah, I know, go ahead and groan. I probably deserve it. Probably. While you are groaning, though, you might want to go ahead and groan over another door related pun that's a fave of mine:
Some of y'all won't get this (and the meme above), and that's OK. I laugh at this every time though. Every.time.
The next four monsters have a little more complicated personal craving, so it's best to play Tasty Humans a few times and get a feel for the mechanics before attempting to play these critters. The object is, after all, to score the most points to secure the win. These four require a little more experience to fully maximize your scoring effort.
Werewolf
Werewolf's Personal Craving
I'd hate to encounter this fierce-looking creature in the woods, unless he went by Professor Lupin, or "Moony" as his friends would sometimes call him. Even then, I'd rather not take my chances. Is it just me, or do many who read this envision a scene from a certain movie when you see the word "werewolf?" Go ahead, click here and you'll be treated to one of the funniest scenes in a movie involving werewolves. I'll wait for you.
What did you think? Pretty funny, huh? Abby would think so.
Giant Slime
Slime's Personal Craving
Let's all channel Peter Venkman and say it together: "He slimed me!" Bonus points if you are the first to tell me in the comments section below which character he said that to. I'll even give you a special shoutout in my next blog.
The Snake
Snake's Personal Craving
Since Hannibal Lecter isn't part of Tasty Humans, I guess "The Snake" isn't referring to Kenny Stabler. I'll take "Obscure References" for 500, Alex. And no, he wasn't in Slytherin House. At least that I'm aware of. I'm not saying Kenny Stabler was a monster like Hannibal Lecter. After all, one is just a fictional character and the other was a real person.
Massive Spider
Spidey's Personal Craving
My sister hates spiders......hates them! Kinda like with me and snakes. If she randomly drew this monster we'd have to invoke a house rule to let her draw again. Shelob or Aragog? Makes no difference. They are all creepy enough.
Now that we've met the main cast, let's take a look at the villagers (the game designers call them "Adventurers.") that have appeared on today's menu. As we approach their village, they will form up and try to defend their homes. While there is some safety in numbers, individually they aren't that brave. As you select an adventurer to eat, he/she will realize that resistance is futile and give up. The adventurers around him/her, though, will continue to fight you, and will even cause you some damage.
Apparently, the adventurers have had a modicum of training, because they form into a 3 X 3 phalanx and advance towards you, the monster. This grid is formed from a shuffled deck of cards, and as adventurer gets eaten, others will replace them, brave souls that they are. Forwarrrrd......MARCH!
Here they come!
I created this initial tableau to introduce each type of adventurer and show any special powers they might have. Since these are drawn from a shuffled deck of cards, it is entirely possible to have something like this in a real game. The row at the bottom of the tableau represents the adventurers closest to you. This is important in how the adventurers are replaced when eaten. The empty spots are replaced by the adventurer immediately behind them, and as these shift downwards, the resulting empty spaces are then filled from the deck.
Other than the peasant, each of the other adventurers offers some sort of damage (swordsman and archer) or help (wizard or cleric). As I mentioned previously, the actual adventurer you eat won't cause you any harm, but the ones around him/her might. Selecting any adventurer immediately adjacent to a swordsman will cause you one damage. In the example below, selecting the wizard, top-right peasant or Captain (in the very center) will cause you one damage token from the swordsman.
Slash and stab!
The archer will protect any adventurer exactly two spaces away. In the example below, the top-right peasant and bottom-left Captain are covered by the archer. Selecting either of these will result in one damage token added to your belly.
Long-range protection
Notice anything about the top-right peasant? There must be something special about this guy. Maybe he's a good cook, or just popular. Selecting this villager will result in two damage tiles being placed!
We have you covered, peasant.
Two damage tiles? Ouch! Why even bother munching this guy, then? Good question! It could be for the two crowns on the card or the specific body parts you need. Sometimes you have to make that trade-off to get what you need.
Our adventurers take their inspiration from the captains and bravely follow them to battle the monsters. With banners held aloft, our captains will lead the charge with a hearty "Follow me!"
Oh, Captain, my Captain!
That's all good and well until the captain is the one who gets eaten.
Uh ohhh....
Notice in the photo above the banners (circled in yellow) our two captains are carrying? You might want to click on the photo to see a larger format. Go ahead. I'll wait.
See how the bottom-left captain has a banner with a horizontal arrow? The captain in the very center of the tableau has a banner with vertical arrows. When a captain gets eaten, the adventurers they are leading panic and flee. The captain in the center, with the vertical banner, is leading the center column. The bottom-left captain, with the horizontal banner, is leading the bottom row. Let's suppose our monster decides to eat the bottom-left captain.
Two things are going to happen. First off, our monster will take one damage from that archer in the bottom-right. Oh, yeah, that pesky archer! The second thing that will happen is the cleric and archer (after firing her arrow) will lose hope and run. Thus the entire bottom row is removed from the group. The adventurers still advance and a new row of three is drawn from the deck.
The new formation
The tableau now has a new swordsman, archer, and peasant joining the ranks. Here is where planning and strategy are important. Since the tableau changes with each adventurer that is eaten, the order in which you decide to eat is important. Maybe taking out that captain will allow more villagers with the body parts you want to appear.
One key component I haven't touched on yet is the "leader tiles." These tiles are placed like body parts and damage tiles at certain points in the game. Different leader tiles offer different ways to score points. I wrote previously how some adventurers had crowns on their cards. Each time your monster selects an adventurer to eat, that card is placed next to his board. At the end of a round, every player counts how many total crowns their cards contain. The player with the most crowns is crowned as the "Draft Leader." See what I did there?
The draft leader has first choice of which leader tile he/she wants and the one with the second most crowns picks second, etc. Placement of these tiles is crucial, as where they go and what body parts surround them are what scores points. I'll show you how all of this is put together shortly.
Leader Tile Board
I've mentioned how the swordsman and archer will cause your monster to take damage. This damage takes up space in your monster's stomach, and depending on how much damage is present, it can even cost negative points at the end of the game.
Let's revisit our legendary dragon after eating several adventurers and taking some damage. Did you pay attention to his personal craving earlier?
Scoring some points
With some astute planning and a good dose of lucky card draws, our dragon has already scored 10 points by filling his stomach with two different 2X2 blocks of similar parts. Doing this has caused some damage, though.
A little indigestion?
The red arrows show the damage tiles that are giving our dragon a little difficulty. These tiles take up space that could be filled with useful body parts. Remember that two or more adjacent damage tiles start counting as negative points at the end of the game. The two rightmost damage tiles are adjacent, so that's two fewer points at the end of the game.
Unless.....
What if there was a way to remove these tiles? Thankfully, our village has a few clerics that will fit this requirement nicely. After eating a cleric (but adding a damage tile first, if applicable), the monster can remove a damage tile of his/her choice. Just think of it as "Magical Maalox."
Next on the menu...
We found this cleric amongst the adventurers that was, no pun intended, ripe for the picking. No swordsmen or archers were close, so he would do nicely. Reaching out with our talons, we snag our cleric and gobble him down. I decided to clear the second damage tile from the right.
Feels better already
If you'll scroll up a bit to the Cleric card, you can see that he'll supply an armor and boot tile, arranged horizontally. I placed these on the dragon's board and will now decide where to place them. Remember that I can rotate these tiles, but must keep them in their original order.
Time for a little board game Tetris.
Pretty cool, huh? The wizard card allows you to swap two adjacent tiles after eating him. This can help organize the tiles in your monster's stomach to score more points or separate two adjacent damage tokens. Don't count on finding too many wizards or clerics, though. There are only a few of each in the whole village. It's better to try placing the body parts to allow the best score as you go instead of relying on the possibility of finding a wizard or a cleric to help you out later.
Besides the personal cravings, the leader tiles also help score points. Take a look at our Twin-Headed Dragon from an actual game we played. I circled all the leader tiles currently in play. Oh, that yellow crown, by the way, is the current Village leader (first or active player in other games). Anyway, four leader tiles have already been placed, and there's another in the holding area (by the rightmost dragon head) ready to be placed at the end of the round.
Gettin' kind of full
Let's focus on just that bottom-most tile to see how it'll get scored at the end of the game. Again, you might want to click on the photo to see a larger version of it. I promise you won't lose your place here. This tile was placed early in the game, hence its place near the bottom of the stomach. While it looks complicated, it's really not.
Good scoring potential
In our example, every helmet that matches the location from the leader tile will score two points each. See what I meant about strategic placement of all tiles? It matters. Sometimes a LOT. You remembered this monster's personal craving, right? Three points for each row that has a matching body part on both ends. So far, there are another 12 points earned.
Having fun? I hope so! The game is rapidly coming to a close, as our twin-headed dragon is almost full. And I'm pretty sure some of those adventurers weren't keto-friendly. With the last adventurer consumed, and our twin-headed dragon full, we need to determine our score.
How many calories did I just eat?
We'll flip the Leader Tile Board over (No, not a "rage flip!") to reveal the scoring track on the other side. Each monster has its own score tile, and for those prodigious scorers, the reverse of the tile has a +50 on it to keep going.
Add up those points
If my math is correct, and I haven't overlooked anything, my twin-headed dragon scored a total of 51 points in that game. Not too shabby for only a few plays in. Have you ever played Tasty Humans? What was your best score? Which monster is your favorite to play? Please leave a comment below and tell me all about it.
I hope you enjoyed reading my thoughts on this fun game. If you enjoyed this one, I have several other board game blogs I've written. To make them more convenient to find, I made all of the game titles clickable links.
With so much being on "lockdown," we haven't done a lot of traveling for me to write about. At least Cindy and I have been able to play many games, so for now I'll concentrate on writing my thoughts on what games we've especially enjoyed playing.
My usual readers know how I love to throw in bad puns (sorry, Loren, I know some of these are really painful for you to read) and obscure movie references (John, would you believe how hard it is to pare down my references to just a few) and I'd love to see how many you caught. Let me know in the comments below what you found.
Here are my thoughts on other games I particularly enjoy:
I post many game-related photos on Instagram, and you can find me on IG by clicking here.
Until next time....
carpe cerevisi
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